Do you go on a lot of dates but find women never agree to a follow up date? Or perhaps you are lucky enough to date them for a while, only to have them disappear on you with no reason or leave you a ‘Dear John?’ Perhaps it’s not them, it’s you! You may be displaying highly unattractive traits which you aren’t even aware of. Here are MensStuff we take pride in being brutally honest and are here to set the record straight.
According to our resident MensStuff chick, these are the types of behaviour or habits that women find most off-putting! You might recognise one or two of these habits in yourself. If that’s case then pay heed and perhaps you might fair better when it comes to the game of love! Here she is with a list of 6 totally unattractive habits!
1. Being A CheapSkate
These days it’s acceptable for couples of those on a date to split the bill, or take it in turns to pay, so this doesn’t mean you have to impress her with dinner at the Ritz and then spend the next month on your sofa penniless and sobbing into your beer can. What it does mean is that dodging the bills or expecting her to be your personal ATM is deeply unattractive. Most women have probably been on a date with one of those guys, the kind that goes ‘get the drinks in’ and then disappears to the loo the minute you enter a bar every time! The guy who requests the most expensive thing on the menu, then claims to have left his card at home after much drawn out awkward pocket twitching, the guy that could peel an orange in his pocket so he doesn’t have to share!
It boils down to respect basically and if a guy would rather spend his cash on his vinyl collection or down at the dogs rather than ensuring he is equally investing in a future with his romantic interest, it’s just not going to last. Get a better job or learn to be a bit more responsible. No woman who has any respect for herself wants a man child in her life.
2. Bad hygiene
This may sound pretty obvious, but clearly given some of the dates we’ve been on, to some it really isn’t!
Bad breathe has to be the most stomach turning thing we’ve encountered! If she’s shown a keen interest but when you suddenly lean in for the kill she makes her excuses, you might want to step up your dental programme and invest in a good mouthwash and floss! Most women will be diplomatic and avoid screeching ‘Ugh death breathe!’as she runs for the door like the Olympic runner Bolt. However we are not. Sort out your gnashers and have a decent shower! Also this applies to things like peeing on the toilet seat, leaving hair in the sink (especially pubes) general slobbiness round the house and poking food with your unwashed grubby mitts. If she finds you deeply repulsive, you probably won’t even get a firm handshake let alone a second date!
3. Bragging
A first date is all about getting to know each other and finding out what makes the other tick. If you spend the whole night bragging about your accomplishments, dropping names or boasting about how you are the best in your field, she will wonder what you are over-compensating for. Those that brag often have low self esteem and boast because they feel inferior. It’s ok to be a little vulnerable sometimes and let the person see a little bit of the real you (we don’t mean sobbing into your hanky and wailing about your gerbil that died on a first date, just be a little more natural) Also let her get a word in edgeways as she may leave the restaurant with bleeding ears. If it’s all about you on the first date, she’s guaranteed to think that sets the tone for the rest of the relationship and will most likely high tail it before you can say “But we haven’t even eaten the main c…..”
4. Being Crass/Crude
These are all major red flags when on a first date; being rude to waiting staff, using sexist or racist comments, generally being disrespectful of other people or your surroundings. How a guy speaks to a waitress on your date is an indicator of how he will speak to his significant other down the line. If he will be rude and disrespectful to a waitress, than you can be sure this is exactly how he will speak to his other half when he feels comfortable further down the line. How he looks at and talks to other women is also a strong indicator of what kind of person he really is. If he eyes up everything in a skirt or flirts whilst on a date he is not serious boyfriend material. If he makes sexist comments or even puts down women, it shows that he has deep seated insecurities when it comes to women and isn’t capable of a serious relationship. Do you recognise any of this in yourself? Better have a re-think and knock these bad habits on the head if you don’t want to spend your 40’s trying to dry the pages of your wank mag.
5. Not Listening
This one is deeply infuriating. The guy that starts looking through his facebook feed or sending a text the minute you open your mouth. The guy that asks you the same question 5 times as failed to listen the first 4! If a women doesn’t feel you are interested in anything she has to say, she is going to lose interest in your rapidly. No woman wants to be with a 2 dimensional character who is unable to connect on an emotional level. Go back to your video games or liking ‘bouncing jugs’ compilations on twitter. You are probably going to be spending a lot more time doing this if you can’t kick this habit!
6. Being Overly Clingy
It’s ok to ask someone how your first date went and if they might want to hang out again soon. However demanding to know how many other guys they been on dates with, how they compare and if you will stop dating other people is just a touch creepy!
Also asking who they are texting every 5 seconds, demanding to see their phone, asking if they fancy every guy that walks past and if they would like to bang him is definitely encroaching on creepy stalker territory!
A healthy relationship should be based on mutual respect and trust. Whilst respect must be earned, one sure fire way not to do this is to be overly demanding, have huge expectations or want to know the ins and outs of a ducks arse. Do you get pissy when she wants to visit her Grandma and throw a sulk? Or accuse her of having a bit on the side? Yes this is creepy clingy behaviour. Nip it in the bud before you have her yelling ‘Cable Guy!” and changing her phone number!
So there you go guys, these are 6 factors that may keep you demoted to Loser-ville unless you rectify your ways. We are all capable of some of these behaviours at a low level now and again, but if this sounds more like a description of your personality at your best, rather than on a bad day, it’s time to have a re-think and make yourself more appealing to the opposite sex. We hope this is of some use to you. And here’s a tip, if you read this and thought of a male friend of yours, do him a favour and show him the article. You may just end up being the best man at his wedding one day if you help him recognise his less attractive qualities!
